As I sit here in Antigua Guatemala on an extremely chilly morning in the court yard looking at the top of the Agua volcano I wonder how I ended up here. This obviously wasn't in my own power, both God and I knew that I needed something radical in order to turn my life around. God, who knows all, picked me up out of Hanover Massachusetts and Flew me 8 hours south to Central America. God’s wisdom is abundantly greater than my own, and intact I wouldn't have an ounce of wisdom without Him. My God can see what happened, what is happening, and what is going to happen. He knows the way for me. The Lord has an amazing plan for me and He has that because He is wise. “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare (peace) and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11. God already knows my future because He lives outside of time. He has a plan and I have no idea what that is. God has mad me some promises for my life and I know that my God doesn't lie and I know that He will follow through with those promises. He knows my way and my walk through his wisdom and to receive the wisdom that He has for me all i need is to ask. My Father is a kind and generous God. He wants me, he yearns for me. My God will not hold back on giving me that wisdom if I come to Him genuinely. I want His desires to become My desires. I want my Lord the show me the way because He has an abundance of perfect wisdom and without His wisdom my desires are nothing. My Lord has things planned out for me that I cant even begin to imagine.
The Lord’s heart is a vast ocean of love and mercy but more often than not I forget how deep and how wide that is. Both bitterness and jealousy are things that I struggle with on a daily basis. I have a hard time forgiving people the same way that my Savior forgave me. I struggle to not be jealous of the people around me. Being a girl there is always something telling me me that I have to be the prettiest and that I have to be the skinniest, but why? If the Lord is perfection He can not possibly create word that is imperfect. “I praise, you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works. My soul knows it very well.” My God doesn't make mistakes. Selfishness is another one of those things that can try to take root in my life. I can look at what I think I have and think that I cant give that up because I worked so hard for it. But you know what, it wasn't my work. Nothing that I do has ever been done in my own power. All of my power is of the Lord and who am I...
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